Autumn Leaves
by Polkahotness
Summary: HxA, R&R, Oneshot. A songfic based on the song, 'Autumn Leaves' as sung by Eva Cassidy, Helga has finally gotten all she wanted, until a simple fight drives Arnold further away than Helga ever thought possible. Can their love defeat the odds?


_**Hello all! **_

_**I really wanted to get back in touch with my inner monologue self so I wrote this oneshot in hopes to accomplish that. **_**  
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_**I apologize, it is a titch sad, but the whole point of the story, I hope comes across as love can never be broken. **_

_**read, review, enjoy and remember, I don't own hey arnold! **_

_**xoxo**_

_**Polkahotness**_

_**p.s. I suggest listening to the EVA CASSIDY version of "Autumn Leaves," I really drew from this song to write this. Beautiful song that is totally worth the listen.**_

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"_Since you went away, the days grow long. And soon I'll hear old winter's song..._

_But I miss you most of all, my darling, when autumn leaves start to fall." _

_-Autumn Leaves as sung by Eva Cassidy_

Skipping rocks was never something I had any interest in growing up. Whenever Bob would take us out in his fancy-ass camper, I used to just watch over the water and wonder what it was like at the horizon, as if I were ever to actually meet it.

It wasn't until this past summer that I found how comforting skipping rocks can be; like painting a new and different picture each time, with each flick of the wrist the ripples spreading across the shimmering canvas of water

Arnold had shown me.

I closed my eyes for a moment, remembering how his soft hands felt on my wrist as he guided it into the proper stone-skipping form.

"_Just, let it go," he had whispered in my ear, a hint of softness masked by his concentration. _

"_And it'll sink like the last one." _

"_Not this one, Helga. I promise." _

_the stone took flight from my fingers, dancing across the water effortlessly. _

"_Four skips... that's weak." I frowned, my arms falling limp to my sides. _

"_Four is great, Helga! I barely had two my first time." _

_I turned to look over my shoulder and smirked. _

"_So how many can you do now?" _

_He then so easily skipped the rock an even eight times, smiling as it sunk into the water. _

I opened my eyes, his smile still burned behind my lids each time I blinked.

The stone was smooth in my palm, my thumb grazing over it for a moment while I turned over my each and every thought.

Autumn had come so quickly it had seemed. It felt just like yesterday he had been beside me on that first day of summer, our legs swinging effortlessly off the edge of the dock.

I looked back down into my lap, the stone still planted in my hands and I bit my lip for a moment before grunting and chucking the rock as far out as I could until it's ker-plunk was all absorbed by the water.

"You caused this, yutz. YOU did. Not me." I called out to the open air, it suddenly feeling like it was suffocating me.

"_You can't play that card with me, Arnold. The 'it's not you it's me' card." _

"_I'm not playing anything, Helga." _

It had just been a simple fight. A fight that revolved around nothing really. Sure, we had pulled the 'let's take a break' thing but that never lasted with us. Our fights never broke us up.

But this one did... in sorts.

"_Then get back to me when you decide to cut the crap and just stop this charade." _

"_What charade, Helga?" _

"_The one where we make it to the end." _

"_What do you want me to SAY, Helga? Tell me!" _

"_We have been together for four years since the summer of senior year. YOU SHOULD KNOW." _

The gusts of wind were getting strong, angrier, and the chill trickled up my spine and all throughout my skin, my shiver almost violent.

I caught the sparkle of the ring on my finger and glanced down at it; the memory almost locked behind the crystal clear stone.

"_We're engaged, Helga. But just because we're engaged doesn't mean I know the inner workings of your mind yet." _

_I crossed my arms, a sigh dramatically escaping from my lips. _

"_Just go. We can talk later." _

_The door slammed, it's echo forever stuck in my memory._

"You're thinking again, aren't you?" he asked from behind me, my head involuntarily nodding to the voice of the wind.

"How couldn't I?" I asked aloud, the water growing irritated at the wind's sudden anger.

"You know you have to stop. You have to go on..." it whispered, swelling around me.

"I won't. You're still here." my lips forced.

A leaf twirled and landed in my lap, just on my thigh as I sat cross-legged on the dock.

"Not really. It's time."

_Nobody had even called me. I had to find out from the stupid TV. _

I could almost see the headline in the reflection of the water below me.

22 YEAR OLD MAN TRAPPED IN CAR FOUND IN LAKE

That was a year ago, and I still don't know how I knew it was him... but I had just felt it.

_I jumped from my spot on the couch to scramble for my phone, desperately calling his number four times until I realized he wasn't answering. _

It was him, _I had thought to myself. _

_The emergency room was so empty, the quiet drabble of the TV wasn't enough to make the silence less loud. _

I couldn't help but picture him with all the tubes, all the wires and beeping the machines screaming incessantly. This is how I have come to know him. All the memories of him locked in the ring around my finger.

"It's not going to change..." I could hear his voice, almost so clearly I wanted to jump. But I knew all I'd find behind me were more broken brown leaves dusting the ground.

"I don't care." I managed, slowly taking my shoes off, followed by my socks so I could immerse my feet in the cool now calm water.

"Do I seem happy, Helga?" I imagined my name off of his lips and wiped a tear that was falling down my cheek.

"Of course not, football-head."

"_Arnold?" I succeeded through the sobbing. _

_Rushing to his side, the nurse quickly added in, "He hasn't come out yet, but we are hopeful. Just... be careful. Are you his only-"_

"_Yes." I cut in, not needing to know the remainder of the question. "It's just me." _

"_And you are his fiance?" She questioned, scribbling something on her clipboard. _

"_Yep." I muttered. _

"_I'll leave you alone." She finally finished before leaving the room. _

_His hands were so lifeless, yet as smooth as I remembered. Smoother than the smoothest skipping stone. _

"_I won't give up on you." _

"I won't give up on you, Arnold." I said, swishing my feet in the water, the fish now escaping from me.

"I'm not asking you to." I could hear in the bristle of the leaves.

"When will I ever hear your voice again, my darling?" I asked, my eyes darting around the empty space around me as if I would find him leaning against the tree a warm smile across his face.

"Soon..." was the last I heard of the imaginary voice I knew didn't belong to the one I had loved since the first of my memories.

_I knew what this new life would hold for us, but I didn't care. _

_I didn't even mind the constant questions of, 'Why are you still wearing the ring? He can't even talk to you.'_

_I just told myself that they didn't understand a love like ours. They couldn't possibly know a love so strong, and hopeful. _

_I knew he would come out of it one day. And if he didn't, I would spend the rest of my life hoping he would. Because I had realized at a very early age that I would never accept a world, a life, without Arnold Shortman in it. _

The sun was starting to set, and I knew Arnold would be expecting me home. He may not know it entirely, but it was the 1 year anniversary of his accident, and whether he knew it or not, I would spend it with him as if it were any other day.

But I had to come here first, to gather my thoughts.

"_Now do it again." He encouraged. "But without my help this time." _

"_Arnold, I only just got it the first time. Criminy! What makes you think I can get again?" _

_He shrugged an smiled, crossing his arms across his chest. _

"_I just... know." _

_Closing my eyes, _and taking a deep breath, _I threw the stone in the fashion that _Arnold had taught me just years _just minutes _ago.

Five skips.

_Five skips. _

"_I knew you could do it." His arms wrapped around me, pulling me into the soft and warm kiss I had come to love so much. _

I wrapped my arms around myself, trying to keep warm in the chill of the wind and crunched my way back to the home we had, or I rather, learned to call home.

Looking back to the now dark horizon, I whispered just loud enough for I and the wind to hear,

"I miss you."

"_I miss you most of all, my darling, when autumn leaves start to fall..." _


End file.
